Any of you reading this, who also pull their hair, probably know exactly where this is going with a title like that.
My hair is getting very thin. I’ve done a lot of damage lately. I want to stop and yet I’m totally apathetic about using my tools. I want to be strong enough without them. But I’m not, end of story. At least not now.
Anyway, I’ve been trying to institute my “tricks” lately so that I reduce my pulling. I don’t feel like its working and then I just get more frustrated. I know in my head “one day at a time” or ” one hour at a time”, one tool at a time, what not. It’s just not working. Friday I was doing pretty darn good in the car, which was HARD. But then my check engine light came on, I stopped to check fluids, was then late for what I needed to do, and ended up pulling a lot. I actually said to myself “well, that was really stressful so I guess pulling is reasonable right now.” Seriously?
I’m pulling as I type this. Do I have a hat on my head like I should? No. Why? Because my husband is sleeping and all of my hats are in there with him. At least that’s the obvious reason. Self sabotage comes to mind as well.
Anyway, today is a new day and noon is a new hour. I need to get up, get moving, maybe work in the flower beds. The weeds deserve pulling much more than my poor hair does.
Hey,
I do know exactly what you mean by “arghhh!!!!” Its just so so soooo frustrating isn’t it?!
I’m 15 and have been pulling since I was about 8. I don’t really have bald patches but on top of my head it is thin and short. I refuse to wear my hair down in public, insisting it’s because “it gets in my way if I wear it down” and can’t stand the hair dressers!!!.
I have no idea what made me do it and once you’ve started it’s a bit of a slipery slope isn’t it?! I only recently knew there was a name for this and I am glad I’m not the only one doing it. I guess I am realising that it’s something I need to face head on and not hide from.
I have my school leavers prom this time next year and am determind to grow my hair!! I know it is going to be hard…..but hopefully this time I can do it!
x
I have found that my change in attitude has helped a lot. I still pull a lot and I don’t know that I will ever truly stop. I’d like to, but so far I haven’t responded to treatments. But when I hid and was afraid and ashamed it was the most awful thing to live with. I still don’t love talking about it. Being shy is less scary. But being open about it has been pretty enlightening as well.
I recently sat at a table with four girls who know I pull. I was talking about it a little and they all shared stories about picking skin, knowing someone who did, or knew someone else who pulled hair. It was freaking unbelievable. For a “rare” condition, most people I talk to know someone who does it, did it at some point during their lives (generally as a kid and they grew out of it LUCKY!), etc. It is amazing the prevalence that I’m seeing. There is no reason for us to be ashamed. BFRBs are everywhere.
What are your tricks for fighting the compulsion to pull eyelashes?
I pulled in middle school & I pull a little bit now. But through most of college I didn’t. The difference? Glasses. If I wear glasses I hardly ever pull my lashes. When I wear my contacts full time I am more likely to pull, usually when I’m reading. For me it is sort of a tactile thing…eyelashes are prickly on my finger tips. So if you find some pipe cleaners or a glittery trip or something that has that same prickly feeling, you could try playing with that. I also have found that I can’t wear mascara. If I do, I tend to get styes the next day and that will lead to LOTS of pulling.